RSVP Early – Don’t hang onto your response card from the wedding invitation if you have already decided what your response will be, especially if your rsvp is no.  Making the bride and groom wait to find out if you are coming is just rude.  Budgets, meal choices, and table arrangements all depend on who decides to attend the wedding and need to be into the reception venue early.  So once you get that response card in the mail, fill it out (don’t forget your name), and pop it back in the mail.

Check the Envelope – Thinking of bringing a “plus one?”  Make sure the envelope says “Your Name and Guest” or “Your Name and Significant Other’s Name.”   Is the inner envelope only addressed to you?  That means the bride and groom don’t have room for any extra guests.  And showing up with a date when he wasn’t invited is a major no-no.  Don’t be that person.

Show Up – Don’t commit the worst wedding faux pas ever.  If you say you will be attending, show up.  The only thing that should keep you away is dire illness or a death in the family.  The bride and groom have to pay for your meal even if you don’t attend, so skipping out on the wedding can cost them upwards of $150-$200, and can cost YOU your friendship. 

Send a Gift – Even if you can’t attend, etiquette dictates you should send a gift.  It doesn’t have to be extravagant.  Simply choose a gift that is meaningful to you and fit within your budget.  You don’t have to purchase something from the bride and groom’s registry, but they would probably appreciate it if you did.  Whatever you select, mail it or drop it off to the bride and groom before the wedding.  You don’t want to risk your carefully picked out present getting lost, or worse, stolen during the shuffle at the reception.

Don’t Wear White – Or Ivory for that matter.  Leave the creams, whites, ivories, lace, and champagne colors to the bride.  Even though the Real Housewives of New York did it in their season opener doesn’t make it right.  Stealing the brides spotlight is never in style.

Go to the Ceremony – Thinking about just showing up for the free food and drink?  Think again.  Skipping the ceremony is plain disrespectful.  Someone is bound to notice your absence and will let the bride know, so don’t think no one will notice.

Give a Sweet Speech – If you’re giving a toast to the happy new couple, keep it short, simple, and sweet.  Avoid inside jokes and dirty language and finish by inviting everyone to raise a glass to the bride and groom.   But only give a toast if you were asked to do so by the bride or groom before the wedding.  Surprise speeches can interrupt the flow of events, after all, you want to get your cake before the ice cream melts, right?

Have Fun – No matter how ugly the bridesmaid dresses, how dry the chicken, or the fact that your ex is there should keep you from having a good time at the reception.  Eat, drink, and be merry…but not too merry.  No one likes a sloshy wedding guest.